Mauve, Movember

He was remembering back to a simpler time, from his childhood, from before. He was unworried, free to go about his business, that serious business that children do.

Then it started to appear. It wasn’t obvious at first, but then as it grew in, it was very clear what was happening.

He was growing a purple moustache.

He was embarassed for many years, always carrying a shaver, lest anyone notice. He tried dyeing it, bleaching it, to no avail.

Then one day, in a weaker moment, he showed it to his partner.

His partner said ‘Your moustache is mauve’!

‘Mauve? I always thought it was purple!’

‘No, it’s totally mauve.’

‘Wait. I’m getting an idea…’ ‘Mauve…What goes with mauve?’

‘Mauvey Povich?’

‘Nah. Everyone knows his favourite colour would be “Burnt-Umber”.’

‘Like the “Burnt-Umber Hulk“?’


‘Wait…I think I’ve got it.’

‘What is it? Tell me!’

‘Quick, what month is it?’

‘November? Mauvember? Movember! And I can say it’s when people grow moustaches and talk about uncomfortable and embarrassing but very important things!’

‘Like prostate cancer!’

‘Yes, that is important.’

‘And regulatory capture!’

‘Yes, that too.’

Early screening is important to reduce the risk of Regulatory Capture.’

‘Wow. There are some intense pictures behind that link. Are you sure that won’t break the fourth wall? And don’t you mean “reduce the risk of Prostate Cancer”?’

‘Yes, but Regulatory Capture is probably just as dangerous or more dangerous.’

‘Fair enough. So, remember folks, get your regulations…’

‘…and prostate!’

‘…checked out on a regular basis.’

‘And if your hair grows in purple…’


‘Be proud!’

‘And get yourself checked!’

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